Growing up gay in a conservative, hetero-normative society is something many don't survive. The oppression to conform and behave "correctly", "professionally" or "just normally" is beyond unhealthy, and too many of our friends take their lives, every year, because they can't visualize a way out of bullying and social exclusion. I learned, very early on, that I was attracting unwanted attention for simply being authentic, and that there wouldn't be enough external forces to stop the bullying coming from religion, family, school and, honestly, every other place and person! Society was too much, and so I decided to be even louder, as quietness wasn't working on my favor. Blending in wasn't an option for me and so I took the rough road!
No one fights back because they want to, and this survival mode can sometimes teach you wonderful, valuable lessons! Learning to control your defense mechanisms is a powerful weapon that keeps many of us alive longer! I survived homophobia from my parent's religious belief and their ignorance trying to put me through conversion therapy; bullies at school and work hurting me physically as psychologically on a daily basis; a random attack and murder attempt by white supremacists inside a moving train in Brazil; constant racism as an immigrant; plus all the demons that I built up in my own head as a result of all these traumas.
As a consequence of surviving all of this, I can proudly say that I am really, REALLY strong! And, more to the point, that I am also thankful and incredibly lucky to be still alive!
Before I move on, let me just say one important thing: if you feel at all sorry for me... please DON'T! Instead, please joint me and fight on my side! Your voice matters and this is a fight that we all have to undertake in order to succeed!
Being different and loud scares a lot of people, but it is your most valuable and vital characteristic, and you should protect it and love it! I will use my platform to empower and work on helping friends that have had their hearts broken, but thankfully, not stopped. You belong, you are loved and you will always have a family in me. Gay history is the history of strength, and it is directly tied to the history of oppression, denial and, consequently, resistance.
I will share some of my knowledge and history in this page, hoping to educate friends, family and website visitors on the history of my people, the gays! So, you better go get your popcorn, b'cause its gonna get really intense up in here!
We are all Jenny
As history proves, life is much harder for Cisgender woman, Gay woman and Transgender woman, than it is for male-like folks! Very few woman might not have gone through a life of traumatic situations where they are made feel they need to comply and do things “the right way”.
In many occasions they feel that their bodies are never enough the way they are, with their mannerisms constantly questioned and poked at and their sense of worth attached to the needs of others.
These two iconic songs bellow touch in really smart ways the topic of misogyny, with characters that have similar names, Jenny in English, Geni in Portuguese, both being described as failures, even though their stories are very successful if a sense of fairness was to be brought to the table.
Two links bellow for the North American and the South American takes on woman that didn't quite do it "the right way"!